Most of my experiences in martial arts have been either good, very good, or great. I have been blessed to have now or in the past, some of the greatest teachers for me. From current ones such as Vladimir Vasiliev to ones in the past such as Gary Michak Sensei. I will forever be grateful for their lessons both in martial arts and life in general.
Stay with anything long enough and you get the yin with the yang, the good with the bad. I started in 1985 so the math alone tells the reader that you know what is coming.
About 7 years ago, I was testing for another black belt, this time in Japanese sword. I truly loved and deeply respected my late teacher, Bob Elder Sensei, and thoroughly enjoyed the company of my fellow students which made this even more difficult.
After I tested (and happy to say, passed) – I did something to this day I have no idea what – that was so “egregious” to one of the teachers from St. Petersburg that he found the need to essentially scream at me in from of the entire group which included high ranking Senseis who flew in from Japan.
To say I was livid was an understatement. I do not treat people in that fashion and do not allow myself to be treated as such, regardless of rank or status of any sort. However, given my respect for Elder Sensei, I kept my mouth closed. (This was harder than the black belt test.) It was truly both unnecessary, crass and an embarrassment. Whatever this almighty terrible thing (probably walked in front of him instead of behind) I did could have easily been addressed by pulling me aside and speaking to me in a decent, respectful fashion.
That did not happen.
For a long time, it bothered me a great deal. But when you work on yourself long enough, eventually a resolution is found for anything. I forgave him. I also began to appreciate what he did in a strange sort of way.
Contrast is a great teacher at times and though my teaching style was nothing like this, I was reminded how NOT to treat students. We are not living in feudal Japan or fighting for our lives. We are doctors or accountants or electricians with families and dogs. We do martial arts out of passion. To be treated in such as fashion was a reflection of an ego out of control.
Most of the high-level instructors that I have encountered live their lives with honor and treat their students with respect. They push them hard. They correct when needed. But none after ever tried to embarrass a student, let alone in public. The contrast was clear. A great teacher like Peter Carbone Sensei shows one way. Co-called “‘Sensei’ F” showed another.
I am reminded of perhaps the greatest of the great coaches ever – John Wooden from UCLA. A grad student followed Coach Wooden one year and noted that when he spoke, 50% of his words were compliments and 50% were corrections. Former UCLA star Bill Walton spoke with reverence about how Coach Wooden treated his players, the opposition, and the game itself. It is unfortunate that not all follow this path.
As martial artists, we are “required” to read books such as Tao of Jeet Kun Do or Book of 5 Rings, regardless of our art. Reading “The Life of John Wooden” should be added to this list.
Central Florida Systema School 
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